Australia has just crumbled to a loss by an innings and 135 runs against India. Wet Sao biscuits have provided greater resistance.

Today’s loss is confirmation of the death of Australian Test cricket, that once great and mighty force which dominated the world for much of the 20th century but which is now so lifeless not even the cast of Weekend at Bernie’s could revive it.

There was some conjecture after the match on the sandy strip at Chennai last week that the surface had contributed to Australia’s demise.

Now we know the truth. The entire team, captain Michael Clarke excused, is just hopeless.

The loss is Australia’s fifth successive loss in a Test in India, and the first time India has beaten Australia by an innings or more since 2000.

Australia’s second innings of 131 was also the fifth lowest score against India on record.

Compounding the humiliation, Australia actually declared in the first innings, while Indian batting big guns Virender Sehwag and Sachin Tendulkar barely troubled the scorers.

In further food for thought, none of the Indian batsmen have sleeve tattoos. Just sayin’.